random cribs
Are memoirs exaggerated glories of childhood...? Do people truly have such idyllic childhoods as described in some books and movies?
I just finished reading Madhur Jaffrey's Climbing the Mango Trees: A memoir of a childhood in India. It was such a wonderful nostalgic read. But nearly everything seemed perfect....I am sure she had problems in her childhood, but the worst thing that Madhur mentions are typical teenage issues and some things that came up during the India-Pak partition. She was certainly privileged. The childhood she decribes is a far cry from what my grandparents had....she is about 5 years younger than my Grandma, so I do have something to compare her experiences with. I must say I felt a little envious when I read about how she had so many cousins from being in a joint family...her little adventures in and around her house....the fact that she had such fabulous heavenly food almost everyday and had a mango orchard in the backyard....definitely sounds like a slice of heaven. Hmmm mangos....I cant even remember how long it has been since I had a ripe, sweet raspuri from my grandfather's orhcards.
I have a hard time relating to such descriptions. I am an only child and I have spent my entire life coping to survive. And when I read about these beautiful childhoods, a part of me gets sad for having missed out on fun that actually is somebody else's experience and another part of me starts wondering if this description is true. The feeling gets even more intense when I watch all these darned desi movies with depictions of ideal families and joy and happiness that flow like the ganga. Those cliched scenes of mothers doting on sons and ramu/dinu/munshi kaka making baby's favorite halwa evoke a sense of loss in me.
And it does not end there. All my friends seem to have a great time with their families. I seem to be the only one who has serious issues with her family. The only one whose family is not always happy happy...taking trips and making halwa and laughing and joking. Its another thing that hubbs and I more than make up for our rather serious families. But still....these movies and books somehow set the expectations for you and they reinforce it movie after movie and book after book. Makes me want to have a large family....maybe I should have 7 or 8 children!!
I just finished reading Madhur Jaffrey's Climbing the Mango Trees: A memoir of a childhood in India. It was such a wonderful nostalgic read. But nearly everything seemed perfect....I am sure she had problems in her childhood, but the worst thing that Madhur mentions are typical teenage issues and some things that came up during the India-Pak partition. She was certainly privileged. The childhood she decribes is a far cry from what my grandparents had....she is about 5 years younger than my Grandma, so I do have something to compare her experiences with. I must say I felt a little envious when I read about how she had so many cousins from being in a joint family...her little adventures in and around her house....the fact that she had such fabulous heavenly food almost everyday and had a mango orchard in the backyard....definitely sounds like a slice of heaven. Hmmm mangos....I cant even remember how long it has been since I had a ripe, sweet raspuri from my grandfather's orhcards.
I have a hard time relating to such descriptions. I am an only child and I have spent my entire life coping to survive. And when I read about these beautiful childhoods, a part of me gets sad for having missed out on fun that actually is somebody else's experience and another part of me starts wondering if this description is true. The feeling gets even more intense when I watch all these darned desi movies with depictions of ideal families and joy and happiness that flow like the ganga. Those cliched scenes of mothers doting on sons and ramu/dinu/munshi kaka making baby's favorite halwa evoke a sense of loss in me.
And it does not end there. All my friends seem to have a great time with their families. I seem to be the only one who has serious issues with her family. The only one whose family is not always happy happy...taking trips and making halwa and laughing and joking. Its another thing that hubbs and I more than make up for our rather serious families. But still....these movies and books somehow set the expectations for you and they reinforce it movie after movie and book after book. Makes me want to have a large family....maybe I should have 7 or 8 children!!
posted by Arpana Sanjay at 1:57 PM
1 Comments:
people lie all the time dear. every one suffers and enjoys this world equally worst or well. they just make up the stories to create illusions for themselves and live in make belief world of happiness. by the way they also make money by selling those stories.
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